December 2008
17 posts
Things You Could Do If You Hogtied Me
1. Catch up on reading those old issues of Architectural Digest.
2. Conveniently carry me to the gynecologist’s, Six Flags, or Church.
3. Eat rocky road ice cream without fear of being judged.
4. Continue the rodeo fantasy by completing the calf roping event of the competition, branding my ass with your initials, and then retiring to the ranch to hang up your belt and eat some grits,...
merry whatever, y'all
A big hug to all of you out there in the Innertubes from lil’ me in Oklahoma.
New, Southern post to come at the end of the week. Fifteen hours sleeping in a van, a preteen Texas state trooper, and some of the worst pork chops ever consumed, but we made to Norman.
Happy holiday(s) and all that.
oxox
Ainsley Drew
everything in my room is a mess but I don't care...
From an email exchange.
date: Fri, Dec 12, 2008 at 3:02PM subject: everything in my room is a mess but I don’t care ‘cause I’m in love with you
Me:
Sometimes when we’re out I’m afraid that if I look directly at you everyone will see that you own me.
Him:
That’s okay because out of all the things I own, you’re the one item I would rescue from...
It dawned on me that this could be depression...
1. No headcold lasts this fucking long. Seriously.
2. Facebook searches for exes make sense. Exes from grade school, though? Masochistic.
3. Listening to The Smiths is fine. Listening to The Smiths while going to the bathroom is excessive.
4. Poetry.
5. Showers are suddenly viewed as very similar to trips to the DMV.
6. Sleeping isn’t that cool.
7. Family Guy stops being funny. The...
“We always deceive ourselves twice about the people we love - first to their...”
Bacteria vs Cats →
Cats and bacterium lay it down in this chart-sized smackdown. Place your bets…